Depressed again

[rayvyn2k]

I hate being depressed. Lately I cry at the drop of a hat. I'm ultra sensitive to everything. I don't feel like doing anything or going anywhere, including both work and home.
Where else is there? I don't feel like going to work and I don't feel like going home. I don't want to work...but my place is so damned depressing, I don't want to be there either. We don't have room to put up a tree, and we are wary of putting up any decorations because our kittens are just so wild right now, they would probably just tear them up when we are not home.
I don't have any real friends here, so I'm really lonely.
My family is so far away and I miss them so much...(you don't have to call me, sis!) I wish we could go there for the holiday but we cannot afford it.
I'm not looking forward to Christmas at all. It (used to be) my favorite holiday, but now it just seems like too much effort and the day will not be like it is back home...so I just feel like "why bother?"
My husband bought two of my gifts in front of me, so no shocks there...and I love opening gifts and being surprised.
I won't see the kids or grandkids getting and opening their gifts...
Shit, I better stop now.

Comments

[gina-r-snape.livejournal.com]

Oh, poor dear. Holiday time can be soooo stressful. I'm sure you will be missed by the family.

As for kitties, I don't trust Nymphadora with decorations either. But I did find a way to decorate(in case you're interested). Get ribbons and some tree hangings and thread the ribbon through them. Then you can stick them up high on the walls around your home where the kitties can't get to them with tape or pushpins. I also string garland around the door frames. Sounds weird, but it really does lighten the place up!

Anyway, this might make you feel better...at least you are not so disenfranchised from life that you need to hire someone to open your presents in order to feel like a family. :shudder:

[rayvyn2k.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the decorating tips, I will give it a try.

ugh

[apocryphaglibbe.livejournal.com]

Found your entry through Gina_R_Snape's Friend's list -- it actually pains me to hear you sound so lackluster. As someone who has spent my entire (and I mean entire) life battling depression, I know what you mean about "where is there to go?" when neither home nor work appeals... It's probably never a good idea to give out your personal info, but if you know someone on the list you can trust as an intermediary, I would be delighted to send you a little Christmas present, from one girl who battles the blues to another.

Best wishes, A.G.

[rayvyn2k.livejournal.com]

Thanks guys. You all are so sweet, your comments made my day.