It's no use...my icon lies.

[rayvyn2k]

I've tried and tried to distract myself...but it's really no use.

I miss my husband so much right now my heart just aches. snegurochka_lee I don't know how you can stand it.

The night looms ahead, long, dark and empty. The house is too quiet. I'm a weepy mess and I know it's ridiculous because he'll be back tomorrow afternoon.

But there's still the night ahead. Long, lonely and too quiet.

I don't normally mind being by myself in the house--but usually it's only for a couple of hours while he's gone off on a geocaching run or something. At the moment I feel like half of me is missing. Time has slowed to a crawl.

I hate being alone like this when I feel so down.

I asked him to call me tonight. I hope he can/does.

I'm so pathetic.

Comments

[snegurochka_lee]

Aw. *hugs* It's okay! See, I don't mind a few days or even a few weeks apart. It's when we start getting into the months range that I get really ticked off. :) For one night, you can watch whatever you want on TV, and order yourself a pizza, and play around online, or do something you never seem to have time to do when he's around, etc. He'll be back soon, and everything will be fine. ♥

[rayvyn2k.livejournal.com]

Thanks, Lee. I just don't know how you can stand it. I think I would just crawl into my bed and not come out if I had to be seperated from him the way you are seperated from the one you love.

He called, and while he's missing me too--he's staying at the friggin' Embassy Suites hotel--in a room he says is almost as large as our apartment. Harumph. I told him that next time, he should ask if spouses can go too.

[afighter808.livejournal.com]

Awww.. sweetie he will be here before you know it. I promise. Play Collaspe on yahoo, its addicting, time will pass quickly. I don't know, its a horrible idea, but its the only thing I could think of this quickly. :(
I love you and so does Nicki!

[rayvyn2k.livejournal.com]

Thanks, sweetie. I appreciate your kind words. I'll see you tomorrow...

Hubby told me that he won't be back until nearly time to quit work...sigh. So, it'll be another nearly whole day without him. But I must suck it up and get myself into a work mindset...

Give Nicki a treat from me and I'll hug you tomorrow.

[rayvyn2k.livejournal.com]

Thanks, sweetie. He'll be home tonight!

[islandsmoke.livejournal.com]

Oh, dear. I am so the wrong person for this. I adore my alone time. (Could this be why I live alone?) Even when I was with an SO, I loved having the house to myself for awhile. I agree with Lee that more than a couple of weeks might have gotten old, but I love having time time for myself. Try to find something to do that you like but never do with him.

[rayvyn2k.livejournal.com]

Well, thanks for trying. ;)

See, usually I adore having time to myself. But somehow, on Monday evening, I started thinking about all the bad things that could happen. Car accidents, the cops coming to the door to deliver the bad news...my mind just went to a very dark place. After all--anything can happen, any time. Look at what happened just yesterday to Hank Williams, Jr's daughters. (http://hosted.ap.org/dynamic/stories/T/TN_WILLIAMS_ACCIDENT_TNOL-?SITE=WTVF&SECTION=HOME&TEMPLATE=DEFAULT) So, when I start thinking like that, I try to imagine my life without him in it...and then I spiral downward and I get very, very afraid. My (very vivid) imagination takes over and that's that.

Thankfully, he called me last night and we chatted for a little bit. (This is a huge deal because he HATES talking on the telephone.) He was safely ensconced in the Embassy Suites hotel room (which he says is larger than our entire apartment) drinking a cup of coffee. Somehow, after talking to him, my fears calmed somewhat. (Oh, I still had to stay up until nearly 11pm to exhaust myself so I could sleep, but hey at least I didn't have nightmares.) I used his pillow as a substitute for him and managed to sleep pretty well.

I'm getting ready to go to work now and then I'll see him later. I can't wait!

[aramintasnape.livejournal.com]

*hugs*

Only a few more hours now!